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Wednesday, June 29, 2011

New Bikes, New Bitches -Bedlam follows...

As many of you know, Joy and I got us a new Apple iPad. The BIG one too. And I thought life would once would be grand. And to be perfectly honest, our iPad does 95% of what we used our laptops for (all 3 currently dead). And if all you want to do is look at what someone else is doing on the web, then your good to go unless it has FLASH content, then your just as screwed as a first time Prom date. Where the iPad fails me, is in trying to blog, or use some other type of social interhole. As long as text is what blows your skirt up, you can do that, but the iPad is as useful as a deaf blind mute if you want to upload pictures, anywhere. And that's why my blogs here have run into a brick wall. So, please bear with me while I dig through some dumpsters and see what I can come up with to remedy the problem.

NEW BIKES: Don't I frigging wish! Project RoadPig is STILL, just that, a project. She's kinda like that girl you saw at the park that was bending over to pick up a Frisbee. Nice, long, tan legs, great ass, long beautiful jet black hair, a figure that would make a tuning fork vibrate. And then she turned around and she's at least as old as my Grandmother! Dry heaves! Well, that's how me and The Pig are getting along. I know there's potential, I can see the lines that I want under the rust and the dust. And I know exactly what needs to be done, and I can do that. Not exactly the way I want to do it, but I can get it done. I just don't do it. And putting my finger on the demotivator is hard. Is it the money? The time? The effort? Fear of having it turn out like so many of these lame assed bikes wind up looking like? The tools? I really don't know what it is folks. But for now, Project RoadPig is Project NO Pig until I can relight my fire.

2011 FATBOY: I got a chance to help an old schoolmate out last week by helping her and her son who is a new motorcycle rider, get his brand spanking new 2011 Harley Davidson FatBoy from their storage unit in Trussville, to the Oak Mountain Amphitheater parking lot (huge) in Pelham so he could get some basic riding time under his belt before he headed out to play in the traffic. He did real good with the bike and I have the utmost confidence that he'll treat her right, and in return, she'll take care of him too. I enjoyed the ride too. But then I enjoy any ride!

2005 TRIUMPH AMERICA: Now it's been a long, long, LONG, time since I've been a trumpet player. Rode Triumph 650 Bonneville's back in the day a lot, along with the occasional BSA Lightning and Norton Commando. So my ass knows what a good Triumph feels like underneath it. Had a short experience with an asshole and a Triumph Triple crotch rocket a few years back so I was aware that "Queenie" and the Triumph namesake was still turning out bikes. Then a friend bought one. All of my reports on his Triumph America are second hand stories and opinions as told to me by others. But betwixt all of the info I ever got on the Triumph America, it's ALL been GREAT! And that's rare. WELL... Guess who has a friend who just told me he's ready to sell his 2005 Triumph America? That's right. ME! And I'm seriously considering it too. The price is right, the bike is in great shape, I know it's history for the last 3 years and I know the owner has taken very good care of her too. So, if I can get my little green ducks to stand up and be counted, I might just be the new owner of a sweet Triumph America soon. After I made up my mind last night that I wanted to buy it, I couldn't sleep thinking about all the road trips I got planned. Keep your fingers crossed!

ROAD TRIPS: So, with the thoughts of a new bike in the barn rolling through my little head, I started thinking about the places I've always wanted to go. Here's a few of them...

Grapevine, Texas: Somebody stepped in a whole bucket of shit in Grapevine, TX. And their names were Bonnie and Clyde! Bonnie Parker and Clyde Barrow had a good thing going back in their day. They were tired of the Government and the big businesses of the day sticking their noses in everybody's lives and robbing them blind. So, they robbed back. They were "America's
Sweetheart Hero Criminals" of the day. But, they didn't see that bucket of shit in Grapevine TX, and stepped in it with both feet. On a rural dirt road outside of Grapevine, TX, two motorcycle cops pulled up behind a car parked under the shade of a big old oak tree. As they approached the car on foot, they were ambushed and shot by the occupants of the car. As the Police Officer lie wounded in the middle of the dirt road, they were needlessly executed at point blank range for the shear fun of it. At least that's how the public saw it, and it was here, on a dirt road outside of Grapevine, TX that "opinion", turned against Bonnie and Clyde and set in motion, the soon to follow events that would result in their death. I want to stand in that road.

Gibbsland, LA: Another of my Bonnie and Clyde road trips, but the end of the road, for Bonnie Parker and Clyde Barrow. It was here in Gibsland, LA that they were lied, lured and laid by the FBI. I want one of those bullets!

Trail of Tears: There's an annual Trail of Tears Motorcycle Ride already, but I march to the sound of a single drummer and prefer to go my own way, at my own pace. Some of my Indian Ancestors made that march, on foot, and I want to retrace that time and sleep where they slept, eat where they ate and walk a mile in their moccasins in hopes of connecting spiritually with my people. On my Mother's side of the family tree, I am 1/16th Cherokee Indian. On my Father's side, I get both Blackfeet and Apache Indian blood. I can feel them, often. And they are angry souls.

Civil War-Memphis to Rome GA Battle: Union Col William Straight, took Memphis, but Confederate Col Nathan Bedford Forest was sent to engage, defeat and arrest the intruder. The running battle across TN, MS, AL and GA ensued ending in Rome GA with the surrender and arrest of Col Straight. He was then taken as a Confederate Prisoner of War to the Confederate Prison in Selma, Al. I can't exactly retrace every footstep, but I gotta go.

Civil War Battlefield Tour: What a road trip this is gonna be! Can you imagine sleeping in the same exact spot where Confederate and Union Soldiers slept, fought and died 150 years ago? What about standing in the exact spot where the pile of amputated arms and legs were reported to be 15 feet high? Two armies walked onto the battlefields of that war, ONE Country walked off that battlefield, UNITED!

And these are just a SMALL sampling of road trips I've always wanted to do. But I got my road gear, packed, and ready to go, just got to get a good iron horse under my saddle and the adventures will begin...